It’s May – Recovering from Windburn

Usually for recovery from Windburn, I apply some coconut oil. If it’s severe, treating it with anything can burn, but coconut oil is pretty mild, and for me, heals pretty fast.

Lately I found out I had a different case of WIND burn – that is, I’d been burned by the WIND or burned in my spiritual life. I’m sure nobody else has ever experience that!

Anyway, here’s what happened, more or less. I realized that there were three things I needed to hear, one of which was that I’m not alone. That’s great, except lots of times, I wasn’t experiencing not being alone. It took a while to realize deep down that every time I felt alone, I was listening to a lie. And that the ultimate truth was that I was surrounded by lots and lots of love – which I could kind of get about half-way deep down.

That was part of the start of my breakthrough from being WIND burned. And that happened before I even realized I was WIND burned. Then I dreamed I was pursuing my relationship with the WIND, but not willing to fall in love with the WIND again, because well, I’d been burned once and was not willing to dive in just yet – I was only willing to say, “Let’s see how it goes”.

So, what happened that was so terrible and when? Not sure. Probably it was something small – something did not go quite right or quite the way I expected it to. I got over that, but then the next brick fell off the wall onto my toes. I recovered from that, but then … And pretty soon, there goes the relationship. Oh, sure. Great things kept happening from time to time. Some sunk in pretty deep. But, you know, you keep your heart guarded after a while, and don’t let things touch you at the very deepest level.

So, ok, I’d been WIND burned. I’d tried almost falling in love with the WIND for a long time, but it just wasn’t working. I wanted more. I did NOT want to fall in love with the WIND again. But what choice did I have? I wanted/needed to have a complete relationship with the WIND and the only way to get it was to fall completely, head-over-heels in love again. But I’d been burned before – what about that?

I realized that it was my concept of what the relationship should be like that was getting in my way. And I realized that the only way for me to get over the old relationship (my concept) was to grieve it and let it go. That took a while. I don’t walk into grieving willingly, and even if I take a step in that direction, I don’t run into grief at full gusto. I may end up there, but only with one foot, if not two, dragging all the way.

Then I got through the sad part of the grieving and was left with nothing. No old relationship. No new relationship. And nothing in between. Big zip ZERO.

So, next step, enter into the new relationship, but how? The answer came, I had to accept the WIND in all it’s forms. The WIND can be a gentle trade WIND, gently caressing my hair. Gently whispering to me. The WIND can be a cooperating WIND (which we sometimes see as a guiding WIND). This is the kind of WIND like when you’re out in a canoe or kayak or sailboat and the WIND is pushing you where you want to go. And when it’s not, you cooperate with it to go where you want to go by steering or paddling or tacking the sail. The WIND can be an exhilarating WIND. The kind of WIND, which when you stand in it, you just feel joy rushing through you. However, the exhilarating WIND in the hot desert can be scorching and searing. That same WIND in the middle of winter can freeze my bones. Then it gets a little harder to accept. But it’s still the same WIND, I just need to dress for it, so I’ve been told.

Sometimes there is no WIND, but that may be because I’m not accepting it in its present form. The WIND can also be an adventurous WIND or a whirlWIND. Sometimes when it is, we wish for a gentle WIND. And sometimes when the WIND is gentle, we want it to be anything but. But the WIND is the WIND is the WIND, and if I’m going to be in love with it, I have to accept it as it is.

And sometimes when there’s no WIND, it may be because the WIND is sheltering us from itself. And somehow, no matter how much I don’t like it, I had to accept that also.

Then I could fall in love with the WIND, totally, once more.

Then I realized, even more importantly than accepting the WIND in all its forms; I needed to accept myself in all my forms.

Ahhh, that’s better!!! Now I can breathe!

Until the next crisis 😣